There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
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