Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
