I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Randomize
