I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Randomize
