So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Randomize
