would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize