Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
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