Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
Randomize
