It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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