Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
