Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
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