You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
