And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize