Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
Randomize
