Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
No subtext here. People are naked.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
is that a dick in a sweater?
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
