can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
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