i think my tv is drunk
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Randomize