How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
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