Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I cut my penus on the lid.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Randomize
