the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
vagina is talking i cant
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
