your thong is hanging out like whoa
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Randomize
