do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize