Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
Randomize
