well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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