OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
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