yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
bring money and cleavage
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
