I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Randomize
