dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
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