It's just like the Real World with babies
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
