I hate all girls vehemently.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
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