If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
