wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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