Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Randomize
