My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
She's the barista slut.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
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