I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
Randomize
