Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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