like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
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