"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
