Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
