what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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