You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
