Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
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