I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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