If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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