You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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