I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
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