nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
