A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Randomize