walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
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