...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
