Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
she told me i tasted like america
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
